Thanking the hosts

I sat down today to write a thank-you note to my friends who hosted a dinner and wine-tasting event last Friday at their beautiful and impeccably decorated historic home in Denton. Because I'm always at a loss for words when writing such notes, I consulted Emily Post's Etiquette.

Says Ms. Post:

"IN writing notes or letters, as in all other forms of social observance, the highest achievement is in giving the appearance of simplicity, naturalness and force.

"Those who use long periods of flowered prolixity and pretentious phrases--who write in complicated form with meaningless flourishes, do not make an impression of elegance and erudition upon their readers, but flaunt instead unmistakable evidence of vainglory and ignorance."

Sound advice, but she sets a bad example, if you ask me--like the pot calling the kettle black, to pull from the trite, overused aphorism. Nonetheless, I set out my finest imported French stationary with grape-cluster rèlief and gave my best attempt at 21st-century non-prolixity (and I sure hope that my hosts don't read this before the note reaches them):

"Dear Emily and Kevin, It was so thoughtful of you to invite me to your wine tasting and dinner last Friday. My palate got a much-needed workout, and I must say that never before has drinking wine out of paper sacks seemed so righteous. The whole event--and not just the prosciutto bread--truly made me want to slap my mother (adequate metaphor, indeed, Emily). --Gratefully, Sean"

Yup, I think I nailed that one. Surly Ms. Post would be proud.